{Like-Minded Community}

"Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works. And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near." Hebrews 10:24-25

Over the last month or so, God has very clearly reminded me that we need to be in community with like-minded people. He has reminded me in a variety of ways, most recently, though, in the form of a couple of friends stepping up their prayer and marriage examples for Nate and I.

If you have these types of friends, hold on tight. Cherish them. These are the friends with whom we should want to spend most of our time. The friends who are truthful, kind, loving, and unashamed of the Gospel. This is not to say that we can't be witnesses of God's love to other friends who need Him. What I'm talking about right now is the people who we see most often and the people with whom we form bonds should have similar beliefs and mindsets on God, life and family.

Us humans are easily influenced, this isn't news. Whatever we spend our time doing (or who we spend it WITH) comes through in our personalities and our attitudes. And we want to be like Christ, right? Well, we need help with that, and God gave us friends.

Here are some ideas about the people with whom we should want to be spending our time, and the type of friend we should want to be: (and you can vice-versa all these phrases):

Surround yourself with friends who aren't afraid of give-and-take.
Be the friend who makes people feel comfortable about sharing their stories.
Surround yourself with friends who make you want to be a better person.
Be the friend who listens intently.
Surround yourself with friends with whom you can discuss the tough questions.
Be the friend who invites people over and doesn't mind if they stay until midnight.
Surround yourself with friends who teach you and lift you up.
Be the friend who gives generously.

"Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results." James 5:15

-Stephanie

{Pre-Wedding Pep Talk}

I know many couples getting married this summer and fall. Hoards of wedding advice and marriage tips are probably being tossed your way right about now, between bridal showers and in-laws and church friends and wedding blogs. I am sure most of the advice is valid, but remember that each marriage, each couple, each LIFE is very, very different. So instead of being overwhelmed (or thinking "Wow, I need to apply every piece of advice to my life RIGHT NOW") thank each person for their thoughts and tuck it away for when you really need it. 

That being said, I wanted to share a Bible verse that is really important to me and my husband. Think of this as a little pep-talk. Ephesians 4:2 - "Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each others faults because of your love." It's hard to always live like that, but remember that the Word of God is true and it keeps us in check with where our hearts are. Marriage is a balance of giving. You give your love, your time, and encouragement. And it might seem like a lot, but if you are each giving each other equal amounts of everything, you'll both be getting just what you need! 

<3 Stephanie

{I Know that “I Know,” but really I don’t..} Brittany Stites

...because if I did, I wouldn’t have needed to be reminded.

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     Have you ever had those moments where the stress is crushing and the anxiety clouds your brain like a thick fog? So many pressures, thoughts and emotions all at once! And all you want to do is crawl into a deep dark hole where nobody can find you, not even your own thoughts?  This is me more often than I would like to admit, being controlled by the fruitless things around me instead of allowing Jesus’ peace to fill me.
     What usually brings me from my state of selfishness are simple words from others. Words that I would have known and even said to somebody else in their own time of distress. But when the waves are rolling in, pounding my body to limpness, I so easily forget and am in need of a loving and graceful reminder.
     The first starts with a ring on my finger and my Mom. It was a bright and beautiful day, I was 19 (I know, so young!) and I was home for the summer from school. But first let’s take a look two years prior. This really amazing and handsome guy finally asked me to be his girl! And from that moment on I knew we would be together forever.  Jokingly, we had discussed that within two years’ time we would be engaged. Well, those two years had passed and we were thinking we were about ready.
     Now let’s get back to that beautiful summer’s day. My mom and I had struck up a small conversation about marriage and the words “You have to give your Dad and I at least a year’s notice.” came confidently from my mother’s mouth. I freaked. What was a girl to do? I was planning on a 3 month engagement! So with a bit of sass, I quickly responded, “Well then! Here it is! Plan on next summer!”

     With much grace my mom said, “Brittany, you must have a ring on that finger when you tell us.” (Are you kidding me! Engaged for a whole year!!! How is a young couple going to even survive 3 months!) I panicked, the fog rolled in and all I wanted to do was scream! After a ton of push back the tears began to flow; how would we beat temptation knowing we were to be married? Then I was reminded. “It’s going to be okay.” (Mom, you’re the best!) These words; so simple and small, made a world of a difference in a nervous and scared 19 year old girl. Within seconds Jesus filled me with peace. We could do it!
     The second, a fight with my husband and a choice to never look back. I believe my husband and I fight in one of the worst ways. When one of us gets frustrated with the other our initial response is to shut down, becoming tensely quiet with only sarcastic remarks to cut the silence. This will continue to happen, getting worse by the minute until either something is said or tears (usually mine) are shed.      With this in mind let’s take it back to Christmas Eve 2014 (yep, four and a half months ago). There had been a lot of pressure, stress and anxiety piling up for about three months as we were in transition of moving to Oakland, currently living at my in-laws’ house, with a job that paid less than half of our bills. And it didn’t help when I chose to throw around my frustration in regards to the fact that Christmas Eve wasn’t what I wanted or expected. We eventually found time to ourselves in a place where we were able to openly communicate, forgive, and verbally express our love for one another. Shortly after, my husband grabs hold of me, looks deep into my eyes and says, “I am so thankful for these moments. I hate them, but I am so thankful because we get to display the Gospel to each other by forgiving and giving grace.” (I know, wow!) I haven’t looked back; every time my husband and I sin against each other we get the opportunity to forgive, love and give grace.
     In the third recent memory, something was wrong with my daughter (and we don’t have health insurance!) My whole life I have had the luxury of being able to directly communicate with my doctor or make an appointment anytime I wanted. But 3 weeks ago something was wrong with my daughter and I no longer had that luxury. I didn’t even know if we had health insurance or how it worked if we did. I was at a loss and my daughter needed something I couldn’t give her. I was full of fear, trying to keep my cool and scared to death for her. Then my husband reminded me, “Babe, remember she is God’s daughter first and we have the privilege of borrowing her.” I needed these words. Every day we tell Summer “I love you, and Jesus loves you even more.” But in that moment of feeling helpless I needed to be reminded that God loves her and will take care of her far better than I ever could and I am blessed to borrow her for the time being no matter how long or short it may be.
   

     As women, we’ve come to learn a lot through the unlimited resources of this day in age, as well as through our own life experiences. Yet, sometimes we become so clouded by stress and pride that we forget the very things that have been embedded in our hearts. I urge you, when somebody you respect speaks to you with grace and love, grab hold of every word and allow Jesus to work it within you. You will be amazed at the peace and clarity he will give you even when you are in your deep and dark hole.

*We were able to see a doctor the following morning and get tests/ results back within one week; everything came up clear!

words by Brittany Stites

Thursday Round-Up: How I Sing My Worship

     By this point in my life, it shouldn't be surprising to me that my most intimate moments with God always fall in conjunction with music. I've fueled a passion for singing for years and years, and now make a living leading music for the local church. A deep love for music inhabits my soul and yet I can find myself at times dissatisfied with the offerings of the pop-Christian music industry. Confession: I don't always love the newest Chris Tomlin track or the latest Hillsong album. Gasp! Does their music proclaim truth? Yes. Does it honor God? Yes. Does it at times sound formulaic and repetitive? Oh yes. Obviously what's most important are the first two questions, right? I totally agree. But there are times, in my own personal worship and when planning services for the church, when I'm left wanting more than synth-heavy, sing-at-the-top-of-my-lungs, overly-climactic bridge type songs. Sometimes, I want something quieter. Possibly something less emotionally charged. Maybe even a fresh arrangement of an old hymn. 

     Of course, there are endless ways to worship the Lord through song and there isn't one right way to do it. Chris Tomlin and Hillsong have given us an incredible worship music repertoire that is going to bless future generations forever, and I am extraordinarily grateful for the way God is using them to honor Him. Today though, I'd love to leave you with some incredible worship songs that aren't necessarily fitting into the CCM mold. I hope these are refreshing for you and bring you close to the God who is worthy of all our praise. 

1. Only Name - We the Union

2. Blessed Assurance - Elevation Worship

(Granted, this has an epic bridge, but the fresh rendition of the beloved hymn is beautiful.)

3. Though You Slay Me - Shane and Shane

(An incredible song to teach a congregation in response to tragedy and suffering.)

4. Run To You - The Ember Days

5. Tis So Sweet - Jadon Lavik

6. Out of Hiding - Steffany Gretzinger

(This. Don't just listen to it once. It's life-changing, friends.) 

     These 6 songs are just a snippet of the music that's constantly being created out of love for God. You can check out the albums associated with each song to see the beauty these artists have produced as a reflection of God's grace. For some equally amazing (but notably less congregational) music, check out Josh Garrels, Andrew Ripp, Audrey Assad, and Shawn McDonald. 

Happy music listening to y'all!

~ Sarah Elyse

I Will Give You Rest {Devotional}

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30

I know many of us have heard this verse or parts of it many times, usually when life gets busy or things seem impossibly hectic. This past weekend, I was visiting my home church and during worship, the theme seemed to revolve around needing rest. Matthew 11:28-30 was shared and it was a fresh reminder for me that each day we are supposed to need God, it’s not expected that as we mature in our relationship with Christ we need Him less. In fact, the opposite is true.

As I mature in my walk with God, I see more and more how dependent I must be on Him. And when I’m dependent, it’s as if I am taking His yoke, letting Him carry my burdens, and allowing Him to give me rest. That's what he wants.

On the long drive home, I heard the song “I’ll Keep On” and the words hit me –

Faith is something I am not accustomed to
Trusting other people’s something I don't really love to do
It's like I'm standing in the rain and You offer me a raincoat
But I would rather stand there being wet than take the handout

Why don’t we let God give us rest from the things that toil in our minds? Is it that we don’t fully trust Him? Is it that we just aren’t used to having someone to rely on? Is it that we don’t actually believe God when He says he wants to relieve us of our burdens?

He loves us and cares for us more than we know and he wants us to come to Him; it is how he designed us – to need Him. So, let Him have everything weighing you down... He can handle it.



~ words by Ariel Kuhn

{6 Reasons to do a First Look}

The First Look is a wonderful time when the bride + groom see each other before their ceremony. While I completely understand if people choose to travel the ‘traditional’ route, I am so in love with this idea. 

My husband and I did a First Look and it is still the {reason number one} most memorable moment of our wedding day for me. To have that special time, {reason number two} just the two of you, is something you’ll never forget!

The quiet few moments to say hi and pray together will provide {reason number three} peace of mind. It gives you both time to really take each other in and enjoy each other before the craziness of the day begins.

It also allows you {reason number four} get some of the photography “formalities” out of the way. Which ultimately means, {reason number five} more time to party later!

Oh yeah, and grooms? {reason number six} You’ll still cry when your bride walks down the aisle. Promise.

<3 Stephanie

image: stephanie rita photo

All Things Made New {Devo}

Revelation 21:1-5

Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”

He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.” 

     When the flowers bloom and the trees bud and the chill of winter loses its sting, I am reminded that our home here in this broken world is a temporary one. Because God is making things new and alive again for a season as a precursor to the grand remaking of the earth that is to come. Our temporary renewal brings temporary life. The ultimate renewal promises life forever remade and brokenness eternally banished. We will be his people, and he will be our God. FOREVER. This truth brings me joy; incredible, life-giving, worship-inducing joy. Make us new, God! 

~ Sarah Elyse 

Our Oakland Adventure | Brittany Stites

Today we have a guest post by Brittany Stites, who is sharing about her and her husband's journey of planting a new church in California. God has taught them a few lessons along the way, so read on! Thanks Brittany!

My husband, a pastor, and I came from an amazing church in small town Martinez, California. (You know it's a small town when they shut down Main Street for the annual Homecoming Parade!) In October 2014 we were graciously sent out to plant a church. Now we live in Oakland, an awesome urban area, full of culture, color, creativity. I couldn’t be more convinced that we were created to live in this sort of setting! It has been a short 3 months since we moved here and I couldn’t feel more at home. I am seriously IN LOVE!!!!! And every day my love grows deeper and wider for this city. I am literally bursting with adrenaline as I sit and type, wishing you could see my excitement! I think I could run about 5 miles right now!!! Okay, so I think you know I am overflowing with joy to share some of our adventure! 

Making the decision to “Church Plant” was a no brainer for us. It has been in the works for almost 7 years - starting with a passion planted in my husband’s heart during college. As we dug deep through the pages of the Gospels and Acts, our hearts grew with a love and excitement. Now being able to actually live out what we day-dreamed about is absolutely and positively the most joyous and wonderful thing we could be doing in this world.

Now with all the rainbows, glitter and unicorns that planting brings, this has been by far the hardest and most challenging season in our life (and it’s just the beginning). But thank you Jesus for working in and through us to bring you glory! With every tear, frustration, and moments of being stretched and having no answers, Jesus has carried us through it all. We couldn’t be more thankful for the hard stuff, without which we wouldn’t be growing or looking to Him. Even though the learning process is hard and seems as if we will never understand, there is always (usually) that moment when the light bulb begins to glow – and it is beautiful.

When we began the official process of our adventure, we sat down with our mentors. As I talked, the words “I hate the church” spouted from my mouth. Later our mentors graciously responded with, “Brittany, we want you to love Jesus’ Church, the Church is beautiful and Jesus is patiently waiting for the day when He gets to be reunited with His Bride.” As they said this I realized I used the wrong language and furthermore I didn’t hate people. What I did have was a strong dislike for Sunday Services, the building, and all the stress and anxiety that those brought me. I have learned the power and importance of language. Yes, these are simply words, but the more you hear and use words the more a belief is formed from them. Example: if a person is told they are ugly and continues to say it to themselves, they will soon believe they are hideous and not even worth to be looked at.

The word “Church” means something a lot different than what a majority of people think of when they hear the word. It is not a place or a building, an event or a program. It is you and me and everybody who believes in Jesus and is filled with His Spirit. WE ARE THE CHURCH! PEOPLE! I am the Church when my daughter wakes up an hour early and I don’t get time to myself, but I get to show her grace and love and begin to build her character and teach her about Jesus. I am the Church when I have to apologize to my husband for disrespecting him. And he is The Church when he gives me grace and forgiveness! This is a very beautiful thing! But when we associate church with a few hours a week or a location, even subconsciously, we forget that the Church is a body – not a building.

We have chosen to use the word gathering, rather than church, to describe what we do each week. We see the Church as a family that comes together to celebrate, learn and worship – not simply as an event / building we attend. This simple word change in my everyday language has begun to change my perspective of the Church is – and my love for people has grown tremendously. My husband and I have taken a different approach to “Church Planting” then what we originally thought we would take. We didn’t move to Oakland with a large group of people, a building, worship pastor, children’s department, hospitality team, and service flow. We moved to Oakland with a missionary perspective. A missionary doesn’t immediately build a building then begin preaching and teaching to its congregation. They first get to know the culture and its belief. They learn what they celebrate, how they have fun and what they struggle with. A missionary begins to build strong friendships with neighbors and finds connections with others in their city. They take part of things that are already up and happening instead of starting their own thing, all the while being the hands and feet

All in all we are not called to plant a church – we are called to plant the Gospel by being present as Spirit-filled people. Don’t allow the weekly services and buildings to distract you from your day-to-day call to BE the Church – you have everything you need in Jesus!

Words by Brittany Stites