Your Vows. Your Promises.

Hi friends! Today we have a special guest post for you! Pastor Max Marcoux, lead pastor at Elevation Chapel in Newton, MA, is sharing his perspective on Wedding Vows. Having preformed many, many weddings, he has a few ideas and a great reminder. Read on! 

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Have any of you purchased a home? Well if not, get ready for mountains of paperwork! You will be asked to sign over 20 pages, vowing that you will pay for that house. Not too long ago (in the 1960’s) my grandfather bought a building on a vow and a handshake. He made a promise to pay so much a month until it was paid off. And he followed through. His word probably had more weight than any 20-page contract today. Back then, your word, your vow meant everything. 

To me the most beautiful part of a wedding is not the flowers, the pretty dresses, nice music or decorations. It’s the exchange of vows. I performed a wedding ceremony a few weeks ago and the bride wrote her own vows. They were so powerful and filled with love that everyone was emotional and the groom almost couldn’t hold it together. I think her vows were the most thoughtful and loving words anyone had ever spoken to him. 

Many couples choose traditional wedding vows, and those are beautiful too. “I, (name), take you (name), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; until death do us part.” That still brings tears and deep emotion to couples as they recite them because they truly mean what they are saying.

More and more couples these days are choosing non-traditional vows. I have attended and officiated weddings where the couple chose song lyrics as vows. One couple chose an excerpt from “Oh, The Places You’ll Go” by Dr. Suess! There are so many resources for couples to find non-traditional vows that reflect their personality.

Engaged couples often ask me if it’s better to write their own vows or to use traditional ones. My advice is to them (and you) is this: Your wedding vows are not just an expression of how you feel about your fiancé. The words you choose should be a life-long promise from your heart to theirs; not only a statement of how much you love them now, but a commitment of how you will love them from this point on. 

Value whatever vows you will speak on your wedding day more than any of the other details of the wedding. The food will be eaten, the flowers will be tossed out, dresses packed away, but the vows will live in your hearts forever.

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We hope this inspires you if you're stuck on what to say in your wedding vows! And remember, they don't have to be fancy or eloquent. 

Thanks for writing this awesome post, Max!